Feeling unsatisfied?
Take a look deep inside!
What you find outside
will take you for a ride.


White Birds, Blue Sky

White Birds, Blue Sky

Laying alone, naked in hot springs,
staring lazily at the sky,
a flock of silver white birds flies by.
Tracing a shifting V through the sky,
uncertain behind whom to fly;
unaware of the handful left behind,
themselves followed by more out of mind.
As many flocks as birds in the first,
the groups of silver follow in bursts.
The silver retreats to silent blue,
till one lonely bird at last pushes through.
Feeling alone and sorry for myself,
I sympathize with his desperate self.
Until another flock later flies by,
tracing a shifting V through the sky,
uncertain behind whom to fly;
unaware of the handful left behind,
themselves followed by more out of mind.

Dream Car

Dream Car

Your nose is so close
you see scratches, not paint.
Now that whistling hose
hides the roar of V-8.

Seems time has changed
the car you so loved.
Are you ready for change?
Is it a sign from above?

Fool! Go for a walk!
You need perspective it seems.
Quit that jiberish talk,
Don’t lose the car of your dreams!

The best that we have,
We take quickly for granted.
Only our heart can save
what our mind has slanted.

Just Breath

Just Breath

Have you ever wondered why
We’re always trying to buy
A piece of the sweet pie?

Drawn to lights like moth
Willing to pay the cost
Spiritually lost

Without courage to say
“I had a bad day,
do you mind if I stay?”

Afraid to simply ask
Fearing we’ll end up last
Too lazy for the task

As though we don’t exist
Like ghosts in a thick mist
Just a number in the list

Don’t sleep in this morning
Hiding, tired, mourning
Bounce up instead roaring!

Find a higher force
Decipher your heart’s Morse
Set a happy course

You just need to believe
Love, cherish, conceive
Be one, give and receive

Just breathe

Frustration Sells

Frustration Sells

An interesting phenomenon is becoming too obvious to ignore. On average, people are making more money than ever before, and yet we are also working more than ever before. Women have stepped up the corporate ladder and now both parents in the modern family are trapped in cubicles. International travel is now affordable for the lower middle class, but hardly anyone has time for a long journey to their neighboring lands. In countries like Thailand, families are sending their children to the street corner to upgrade their houses and cars. Meanwhile in the western world, minimum wage workers are accumulating credit to acquire the latest iPhone. We donate to GreenPeace and then are too tired to sort our trash. We eat vegan meals prepared on the cheap by strangers in cafes trying to pay their own rents when we can barely afford our own, but when we go shopping we only buy organic at whole foods. We are too busy and exhausted from work to take care of our households, family and countries.

Divided we live, conquered we are.

Continue reading “Frustration Sells”

The day this blog started

The day this blog started

I am sitting here in Tamarack Flat, site #3, which all the rangers keep reminding me is the best. Coastline excluded, up here in Tuolomne meadows is just about the only place in California where the weather is pleasant rather than debilitatingly hot.

I may be in the best place on earth, but I am finding it difficult to make the simplest decisions. Should I wake up now? Is now the right time to brush my teeth? Should I stay here another night or head to San Francisco today?

The memories of the past two weeks of climbing tall granite cliffs and domes keep flashing in front of my eyes everytime I close them in an attempt to make a simple decision.

Until yesterday, I was in the company of four amazing climbing buddies. I was energetically hosting democratic ‘Pow-Wows’ to keep the group moving. I was cooking large meals for us and had no qualms asking for help and handing out friendly commands. I had a vision of routes to climbs and a team to lead. Trailing some of them and switching leads with others, I took us up longer and bolder trad climbs than I had ever led before. I felt like I was truly accomplishing something.

Now, I am alone.

I have created this loneliness for myself by succeeding at all my goals. I work a digital 4-hour work week and live a life of perpetual “glamping” in a 1994 Dodge Conversion that I further converted into a full-time shaggin’ wagon of a van. I am living the #vanlife like a pro.

Except that I am living it alone.

I can’t climb alone and regardless – without someone to drag along, pushing only myself to accomplish physical feats in nature is not nearly as fun. Hikes aren’t worth it unless I can share photos of the adventure on Instagram, but not all beauty is photogenic. So I find myself chasing camera-friendly spots like a volunteer photographer, working extra hours for no pay.

I am left alone to battle my thoughts about life, love and tomorrow. Wondering if it is about time I settle and end the heartbreak pattern. Then I remind myself that I have only just started this traveling phase of my life. I decide to stop thinking and get on with the move. Then I remember how hot it is everywhere else, that I am in the best place on earth for today and that I can’t move on with my real travel plans until after next weekend because I promised a friend I would join him on his party bus plans for his birthday.

So I sit emptily; neither thirsty, nor hungry, nor wanting to smoke or even move. I am bored.

I am left alone to battle my thoughts about life, love and tomorrow.

The pattern repeats.

I write until I have emptied out my inspiration bladder. Then I go grab a book I have been meaning to read for a year. Maybe later I will hike to that same spot I was yesterday: The Devil’s Dance floor. The nearly flat surface of a giant granite dome overlooking the entrance to Yosemite valley is the size of a football field and is the only place I can hike to for a view and reception without packing up my van and wasting fuel.

I know that in just a few days I will be surrounded by people whom I love and enjoy. Or so I hope.